it's all about perspective

I had quite a different post I thought I was going to write tonight. Actually, I had 6 lengthy paragraphs written about how frustrating life has been recently. I decided to turn this post into something different though, to shorten and shift the focus onto something else of the sort...

Basically in short, I was going to ramble about my darling daughter and how rough things have been lately. I was going to share about how since we've moved, Gemma has regressed on her sleep training and will no longer go down for naps or bedtime on her own, but now requires rocking to sleep with a bottle. I was going to also vent about how we are having to wean her off of her bottles, even though until last month, her pediatricians recommended staying on the bottles because of her weight gain and the fact that she's still on high calorie formula. I was also going to share that teething has been a nightmare for this child, turning my typically sweet girl into a very unhappy, easily irritated child who hates me most of the day, until Daddy comes home, whom she then hates and only wants Mama. {In all seriousness, Bryan's gotten quite a few "She absolutely hates me. Nothing I do is making her happy today!!" texts from me during the week.. and then thinks I've been lying when he gets home.} And lastly, in the last few days of trying to get Gemma back down to sleep on her own, we've realized she is now voluntarily gagging herself as soon as she is placed in her crib awake because she knows if she does that she gets attention and will be taken out of her crib for the sake of her not throwing up everywhere. And trust me, we've tried letting her cry it out. It results in vomit. Every time. Within about 60 seconds of us putting her in there.

Here's the thing though. This tired mama is 10 weeks from her due date. Meaning she is tired {wait, did I already say that?}, uncomfortable, and cranky {hey, thanks hormones}. I also found out I am slightly anemic this time around which would explain why I've felt like I've had Mono for months now. But regardless, I am choosing to turn my attitude around. I could totally just dwell on the crazy frustration I've been experiencing, or I can choose to recognize the good in our lives right now and know that this is only a phase. I've realized that baby boy's arrival in a short couple of months is making the clock tick and seem like impending doom if we don't get all of this straightened out right now. While it would be ideal to have Gemma sleep trained and off her bottles by the time he is born, we will see what we can accomplish.

At the end of the day, I am so glad and grateful for the fact that I have a personable, thriving toddler, who makes us laugh round the clock {even when it's doing things she probably shouldn't do}. This little girl's body is doing what it's supposed to {cutting teeth}, and though it's so hard right now, I know this is only a blip on the map. She is walking, practically running, and I am glad she is loving on me and cuddling me more now than she ever has since being a newborn. We have moved into a different apartment that we love and feel much more settled in. And we also have another little bundle of joy, Finn, who will be joining our family in less than 3 months! Like I said, 10 weeks from my due date, and I am getting to that point, but I am choosing to remember that this is temporary and I will have my body back at some point in the near future :) And lastly, I am so grateful that Bryan has a job where he can support our family, and I have the absolute privilege of staying home with my girl (and, soon, boy!), even though some days, I feel like crawling in a hole and staying there. God is good. He knows what we can handle. And I know in a month, 6 months, or even a year, I will look back at this little phase and chuckle to myself. Today I'm choosing to thank God for all that He's blessed us with and asking for the strength I need to get through this time.


sunday night ramblings


well well. another long hiatus from yours truly. big surprise there. we've got alot that's been going on in our lives, but here this goes again!

we are loving this weather. it has been good for the soul! i was so close to almost shredding my winter coat. thankful that we are almost out of the woods and fully into spring!

ooh and we've moved! we are in a new apartment, not far from our old one, but holy cow.. moving while pregnant is not recommended. overwhelmed, over-exhausted, over it all. glad to be in a new place! and i will say, my husband is the best when it comes to getting things done! he took off a few days from work, and i think we are only down to handful of boxes left to unpack! so glad to have him!

i am addicted to pretty little liars. thank God for netflix. (although the 48 hour wait during the move while we didn't have internet/cable was brutal).. anyone else out there sharing in this crazy obsession?

the other day, i was sitting on the couch while gemma was napping. and i should mention we are now on the 2nd floor and the huge window is right next to the couch. so i casually look into the tree outside and notice there's a squirrel in the tree (no big deal, right?). although this particular squirrel happened to be eating a piece of pizza! i kid you not, i just sat here staring and taking pictures of this guy. because... how many times do you see a squirrel in a tree eating a piece of pizza?!

happy sunday, everyone! hope this week goes amazingly well for you!


more about baby #2

photo from 2 weeks ago already- eee time is flying!!

this feels like deja vu.. writing the "more" about my pregnancy. only this time around, i've got a little squirmer crawling around me, playing her red piano with her pink and green drumsticks, eating cheerios she finds anywhere, trying to cruise from place to place.

details on this pregnancy... i'm going to bullet point these as that's probably the easiest.
+ due date: july 8th {which means i'm 18 weeks tomorrow}
+ we found out i was pregnant again one hour before gemma's first birthday party. yes.. one hour before all our loved ones were due to show up and chat with us. we had to put on our poker faces and carry on even though we were thrilled and could barely contain ourselves.
+ we are finding out the sex again. the end of february can't come fast enough! although i am soaking up all the time i have with just my gem now.. trying to cherish this minute by minute!
+ every time we've had an ultrasound, this little babe is moving around.. looks like we've got another squirmer on our hands. this babe will have to be to keep up with big sister!
+ i'm feeling lots of movement throughout the day and gemma is on the brink of walking.. life is getting exciting over here!

more to post later :)


the time gemma figured out she turned on the xbox herself

a while back, i would say before she turned one, i was trying to take pictures of gemma's fabulous bedhead. i couldn't help but be in love with how long her hair was getting and what it looks like when she wakes up and it's crazy {just like both of her parents' when they wake up}... i typically let her play with the remote controls after taking out the batteries {because one time she recorded "Bring It On: All or Nothing"}, but this one day, i chose to just hand her the remote. the tv was on in the background, on the xbox setting, but basically blinking "no input"... she really wasn't paying much attention. I handed her the remote {batteries in} in an attempt to keep her still and...
^hammin' it up

^what's this shiny thing? {notice the middle finger pushing the button}

^wait, it lit up??


^what'd I just do??

^no way! this turns that on???

^let's try it again!


^guys, guess what I just learned?!?!

we've kept the xbox remote from her since she started trying to play nba '13.. ahh she makes me giggle everyday! :)

gemma's 1st birthday party, but mostly just her and her cupcake!

{i am posting this because it needs to be documented on here.. but i am forever late with this blog. trying to get up to speed here!}

gemma's gem-themed birthday party was a blast! we had friends and family celebrate with us and we couldn't have felt more grateful for all those who love gemma so much! she loved her cupcake and was more interested in her sippy cup than opening presents, but overall, it was so great to get everyone together. i looked around at gemma's party and realized that we are so blessed to have so many loved ones who love and support us. a special thanks to our family-- my mom, who allowed us to host the party in her home, and bry's mom and sister, kelsey, who made all the cupcakes! we love you!


oh and did I mention...?

Did I mention in my last post that we are expecting again? 
Baby #2 on the way!! :)

december in a nutshell

Well, well, well... Here's another blog post where I am updating you on the month plus that has passed since I last posted. Let me just sum up the last several weeks in case you are interested in reading why our world has felt a little out of sorts as of lately...

Late November, we traveled to Indiana to spend time with Brad, Jacki & Luella for Thanksgiving and also to celebrate Luella's first birthday. We drove... yes, all 14 hours and it was quite the event. But we made it and had fun. Gemma was somewhat not herself and extremely cranky, which we just assumed was from the traveling and being out of her element. Thanksgiving Day, I came down with a stomach bug that left me in bed sleeping for basically the entire day. The following day, Gemma woke up all stuffy and definitely sick. She had what we thought was just a nasty cold. The poor girl was just not herself and super snuggly and just a plain old sad sight to see. The drive home showed us Gemma was really sick... she slept almost the entire day. Her face and little body was so.. ugh I'm choking up just thinking about how she looked. My heart broke a little bit.

We got home on December 1st after a 15 hour car ride home. We were absolutely exhausted as Gemma had woken up once if not twice a night all 8 nights we were away. Plus a long drive like that.. wow. Hit by a truck didn't really cover it. Another tough night, and then the next morning, she started having stomach bug symptoms. The evening came and it was clear she couldn't keep anything down. We took her to the ER about 10pm. Long story and details aside, they had to send us to Yale Children's Hospital because they were full in Bridgeport. Turned out, Gemma had an ear infection, sinus infection, AND the stomach bug. No wonder we were all so spent.. she was uncomfortable and I felt so lame for not knowing that she had an ear infection. She really is a trooper because she kept on going until those last few days of our trip. After about 36 hours at Yale and two doses of IV fluids, they sent us home with antibiotics our baby girl who was able to eat a little bit more.

A day after we came home from the hospital and we realized the transmission in our only car was on its way out... And then... Two days later, we return home after running errands to find out our oil tank was empty. Rookie renters- we didn't realize it was that low. Luckily, we have amazing family who are always willing to lend a hand!

A few days later, I realized Gemma had a bad diaper rash {which we anticipated from all the stomach bug-ness and the antibiotics}, but it turned out she had gotten thrush from the antibiotics as well. This poor child. We had to change her antibiotic again and then give her a new prescription diaper cream with a steroid in it. Well a few days later, her diaper rash wasn't healing and the steroid was actually too much for her and was burning her skin! Ahh, I was almost fed up at this point. The blood-curdling screaming and trembling was unbearable during diaper changes, and my heart was in pieces because I knew we were going to have to keep changing her. Soaks, nakey time, and a newer diaper cream {that was less harsh} plus some burn cream to treat her irritated bottom... And about 80 days later {that's exaggerated.. more like 7 days later} it's almost back to normal.

Bryan got a promotion at work and I couldn't be more proud! He has worked so hard and essentially had his responsibility already handed to him 6 months ago as a trial run to see how he would do.. He pleased his bosses enough for them to promote him two weeks before Christmas and give him a nice bonus. Yaaaay hubby!

Before I could come up for air... the holidays came and went! We bought a car two days before Christmas and somehow managed to get all of our shopping done on time. I am still feeling super exhausted as most of December felt like I was under water and couldn't come up for air, but it was a wonderful holiday this year and I am somewhat sad to see it go. We are feeling blessed though and are grateful to have our family, friends, a warm home, and jobs.

Hoping you all had a lovely Christmas!
{for reals.. did I really just write that on January 7th?}


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